Whenever we meet somebody new, the topic of conversation almost always steers towards the question . .
“what do you do for a living?”
And when we’re kids, we tell Mummy & Daddy what we want to be when we grow up.
It’s embedded in our brains at a young age that career comes first, & then you build your life around THAT.
Because of that, we have the tendency to attach others, and especially attach OURSELVES to job titles to such an extent that we allow it to define who we are.
I’m not talking about being passionate about something .. or wanting success in something . . but the point where you allow your work and your success/failure at work to dictate the type of person YOU are.
If your job was no longer there for you when you woke up tomorrow morning, how would you react ?? what kind of emotions would you feel ??
Would you feel depressed . . ??
Would you feel lost . . ??
Would you feel empty . . ??
Would it change the way you see yourself as a person . . ??
When you define your own self worth by something EXTERNAL of yourself (like your job), you give that external thing control over your emotions, over your way of thinking . . over your way of feeling . . you’re basically giving it permission to hijack your life.
. . and when the time inevitably comes where something doesn’t go to plan, you stuff up, that loss doesn’t just effect your career anymore, it has a carry-over effect and begins to mould and shape how you view YOURSELF. And that’s when shit starts to get ugly.
The fuck ups that happen at work are not reflections of who you are.
You aren’t a regional manager . . a lawyer . . a sparky . . an athlete . . you are YOU. You were this before your title, you are you now, you are going to be YOU after this title.
In the military, you are not your rank. Rank is INFORMATION. You are not information.
You’re not the games you lose . . the tasks you fail . . the positions you don’t get.
Accomplishments are in the past . . you AREN’T in the past . . so how could you possibly be your accomplishments?
Your morals . . your values . . your belief system . . what you will fight for . . what you will die for . . the very essence of your being . . THAT is who you are . . those aspects of yourself need to live on a different island and be locked away . .
. . and you need to acknowledge them every single day that you’re alive and kicking on this earth . . because when you lose all the tangible things in this world . . your job . . your money . . that’s all you’re left with.
And if your whole life value is based around your 9-5 job . . if you’re attached hook, line and sinker . . when that fucks up, you fuck up too . . you’re left with this VOID that can’t be filled . . because you’ve trained yourself to become all about that ONE external thing. . and when that goes . . you go too.
When shit happens externally of ourselves that we’re not prepared for , those things shouldn’t effect how you view yourself as a person . . that shouldn’t be the test of your self worth . . of who and what you represent as a person –
instead, your morals . . your values . . that belief system you have with yourself, should prove to overpower any sticky situation we get stuck in, because in essence, that’s all that is REAL in this world . . and if you mix that in with the fake stuff . . you’re in trouble.
So how do you not become your success?
Easy in theory . . hard in application . .
1) Figure out what your beliefs, morals, and values are.
. . and never, ever stray from them. These babies are the backbone to every single decision you make in life.
2) Redefine success.
Success doesn’t mean having your mates acknowledge you . . success coincides with your values . . if you fail, it shouldn’t affect how you view yourself as a person and the person that you are. It’s its own separate entity, living on its own separate island.
3) Figure out what else turns you on. Don’t get attached to one thing and one thing only. Enjoy lots of things. For every outlet, you should have another outlet.
4) Spend time on your own everyday.
Whether it be in the morning, or lying down in bed before you nod off . . rediscover what’s important in your life . . spend time inside your own head.
Once a week allocate a time to writing whatever it is that’s on your mind . . WHATEVER comes out off the top of your head . . ideas . . concepts . . emotions . . frustrations . . grocery lists . . it doesn’t matter . . you’d be surprised how invigorating it is to empty some of that storage space inside your brain.
If your job can survive without you, you can survive without your job.